Posted by
hkchoichoi
20 yrs ago
Hi -
I have two kids (2 and 3 months old) who currently sleep in separate rooms. I'd like for them to sleep together at some point, but with the 3 month old still breastfeeding I have opted against it for the time being.
I'm curious for any parents who have kids who sleep together. Could you answer the following questions...
1. What are the ages of your children?
2. Gender?
3. When did they start sleeping together?
4. Are they on relatively the same schedule? If not, how do you manage staggered bedtimes?
5. Do you notice when one sleeps more restlessly it affects the other?
6. What are they sleeping in? (bed/cot/crib/floor)
Thanks!
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Hi
I have a 2.5 year old girl and a 1 year old boy. They've been sleeping together since Finlay was about 3 months old. He didn't sleep through the night until he was about 7 months old, but he never woke up Hannah who luckily will sleep through anything!
I put them together just to save space and in fact it seemed to help Finlay settle himself to sleep enormously when Hannah was singing/talking beside him. They have always been on the same bathtime/bedtime schedule which works really well for me, and generally they are both asleep by 7pm. We've just moved, and now Hannah is in a loft bed and Finlay in a small bed underneath, hemmed in with a few beanbags!
Good luck, I would really recommend putting your two in together, I'm sure they will enjoy each other's company!
Fiona
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cd
20 yrs ago
2 of my boys share the same room, 3 did at one point. But all the kids have chosen to sleep in the same beds as each other since they were small, not every night but several times a week. All the kids have bed shared with us until they chose not too. My daughter used to share with either one or the other of her brothers until she was 10, my 12 year old still often gets in with his little brother and sometimes his little sister, and my 6 year old often sleeps with his 4 year old sister. I'm sure at some point they'll all start sleeping in their own beds alone.
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kooni
20 yrs ago
Hello, hkchoichoi!
I too had the same concerns as you, but my children share a room now, and it's been WONDERFUL!
1/2. My boys are 5 months and 22 months (but I would have put them in the same room if they were different sexes)
3. They started sharing a room last month.
4. They are pretty much on the same schedule, and I did this for my sanity. They are both the the schedules recommended by Gina Ford. They eat, go to sleepand wake up at the same times. Only difference is that the younger takes 3 naps and the older takes 1.
5. Because I am so focused on enforcing good sleep habits in my children, I have been lucky that it's paid off. My older one now has the "skill" of settling himself back to sleep even if he is woken up or if there is some noise in the room. Also, he's always been a very good sleeper at night. The younger one may make some noise, but it's no problem. If the younger wakes from his mid-afternoon nap first, I get him out of the room first and quickly without disturbing the other and vice versa. That said, they both usually nap for about 1hr 45 mins, regardless. Also, the younger one still takes 3 naps per day, so the boys' room is off-limits for playing during nap times.
6. Both sleep in separate cribs in the same room.
I agree with Fiona. I think they like the company. Good luck!
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sub
20 yrs ago
2 Girls. 4.5 and almost 3.
Slept together with MIL since the baby was 6mths. King sized bed, youngest next to wall, Eldest in the middle, MIL other end.
All lurve sleeping together.
When on hols I have to unfortunately sub for MIL, and have 2 rolling into me all night, but after a few nights could leave them to each other easily. But they would definitely wake up looking for the other if one was missing, as it is they just stick their hand/foot out till they touch the other and fall back to sleep.
Older one showing signs of wanting her own bed, and they definitely could now, but I am not pushing it until we fix up their own room properly (trying to decide if elder too young for a bunk bed OR if we should keep them in a double) - I feel if we push them, they will run back to grandma's room too easily.
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this is really great to hear - I have a 4mth old and a 26 mth old and really want them to sleep in the same room but hae been warned by many that its not a good idea as they disturd each other but once we get back from our next trip I will definitely do it!!
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To those who wrote- Many thanks! Lots of encouragement here and makes me want to do it.
The only thing is that I still do one "night" feed for my baby - at around 10:30. Those of you who were breastfeeding while kids were sleeping together, how did you manage it? Did it seem to disturb the other? Also - what to do when colds strike? My husband seems concerned that by sticking them together they will ruin each other's good sleep habits. (both girls generally sleep through the night...)
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kooni
20 yrs ago
Dear hkchoichoi,
Great question. We still do a 10:30PM feed for the 5-month old as well. So, we just sneak in, get him, feed him, put him down, and sneak out. All in the room they are both sleeping in. The older one may grumble occasionally, but that's it. It has never been an issue. I actually wasn't planning on putting them together so soon, but because of our temporary accomodation (while our "things" are getting shipped to HK), we have limited space and have had to put them in the same room. Without a choice, I found that it made putting them together easier, psychologically. SO, I guess I'm saying that if you just act as if you do not have a choice, you just make it work! :) Good luck. It really was easy, and I think they love it!
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oj
20 yrs ago
My girls, 5 and 3, have spent the last two years sleeping in the same room, single beds opposit each other, and even though we have two spare rooms they will not entertain the idea of sleeping apart, they love it.
When they muck about or won't go to sleep i threaten to move one of them to another room and it works like a treat, sleep within 5 minutes.
The other good thing is if they wake before 7 the bigger one reads to the little one.
Finally, kids sleep through absolutely anything, when one is crying the other is sleeping soundly and peacefully, just like their Dad!
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Thanks for all the feedback. Kooni -thanks for the b-feeding advice. i'm really tempted to try it - it's just that my girls have staggered bedtimes - older one goes to bed an hour later (I wish it WERE the same time actually) so i've got to figure out what to do with her when her sister is sleeping in her room. We used to play in her room and then transition to her bed, but it looks as if that won't be possible...gotta figure out what to do with her. All her books, toys, and everything are in there.
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kooni
20 yrs ago
Dear hkchoichoi,
This is no problem at all. My cousin had this problem (staggered bedtimes), so I was forwarned. When they go to nap at different times (which happens occasionally), I occupy one elsewhere while the other is already asleep. I discuss with the older one that his younger brother is already asleep in their room, so we have to stay quiet and not go into the room. We make sure all the toys/books we need to occupy us while the little one is already sleeping are in another area -- the "play" area. Then, when it's time to go to sleep, I just put the older one in the bedroom they share. No problem. Maybe I've been lucky, but it seems to work. :) I think if you just did it and had the attitude that it's going to work, your children will just buy into it. Interestingly, now, my older one will not entertain taking a nap without his baby brother in the room. We had to go to a birthday party this past weekend, so they had separate schedules. It was fascinating!
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Kooni-
thanks for all your feedback and encouragement! I'm going to do it - as soon as my older one gets over her NASTY cold and cough she's got going. I figure it will be helpful when we get to the US for our annual visit and they have one another in the room an d that will also help them to sleep. (I hope.) I'll let you know how it goes as soon as my older one recovers and they start in the same room.
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1. What are the ages of your children?
3.5 yo and 1 yo
2. Gender?
Girl and boy
3. When did they start sleeping together?
When my son was 4 months old
4. Are they on relatively the same schedule? If not, how do you manage staggered bedtimes?
My son goes to bed before his sister and during the day he takes 2 naps
5. Do you notice when one sleeps more restlessly it affects the other?
Not really but if the baby cries in the morning it might wake his sister up sometimes (but never during the night)
6. What are they sleeping in? (bed/cot/crib/floor)
Bed and cot
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i'm doing it tonight - #1 is crying away upset that I put her down and #2 is sleeping through it - thus far (1 minutes in...)
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Did it last night! Girls are still sleeping (it's almost 7:30. I barely slept last night waiting for something to happen, but both girls slept well. Let's hope it continues!! Thanks to all for your help and encouragement.
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kooni
20 yrs ago
Dear hkchoichoi,
I am thrilled for you! I find it makes things easier -- operating as a single family unit. Now, I am dealing with #1 jumping out of his crib! Ugh... If he goes to a big boy bed, what happens? Does he wake us all up? Suggestions?
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Hi Kooni
I went through this in January with #1. (She learned very quickly how to get out and I tried a number of different things.) I had a thread on it - and here is what people said. I found the star chart, sitting near the door so that my daughter would see me, and patience was the key. She learned to stay in her bed, and occasionally these days she does try to avoid it. I use Ferber's "close the door" technique and it works. Since he already has good sleep habits, it shouldn't be too difficult to transfer him.
Here is the thread - feel free to ask me more questions and pointers...(I did like the super nanny suggestion - it is gentle but effective.)
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Hi Kooni
I went through this in January with #1. (She learned very quickly how to get out and I tried a number of different things.) I had a thread on it - and here is what people said. I found the star chart, sitting near the door so that my daughter would see me, and patience was the key. She learned to stay in her bed, and occasionally these days she does try to avoid it. I use Ferber's "close the door" technique and it works. Since he already has good sleep habits, it shouldn't be too difficult to transfer him.
Here is the thread - feel free to ask me more questions and pointers...(I did like the super nanny suggestion - it is gentle but effective.)
http://hongkong.asiaxpat.com/forums/momsdads/threads/76802.asp
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