breast OR pacifiers?

i have created some problems for me lately,giving her my breast for comforts at night.So in the wee hours of morning,she screams and wants'my breasts'.Feeling tired,i comply,thus more problems-everytime the breast

is out of her mouth,she wakes and cries.My body is aching from all the discomforts.

if you have tried the sleep-controlled method,does your baby wakes up in the middle of the night?say,if i were to let her cries herself to sleep at for eg,7pm,if she wakes at 3am,what do i do?what about the afternoon naps,am i supposed to let her cry out?

i need advices.thanks

I breastfed my youngest, now 16 months, until 3 months ago. I also breastfed my older boy for the first 9 months of his life. Both of them liked feeding at night up to about 6-7 months.


I trained myself so that I'd sleep on my side with my baby facing me. When he wanted to suck, he'd just latch on by himself. I used to sleep through it. When he wanted to change sides, he'd wimper and I'd roll him and me over together, he would then latch on by himself and I'd continue to sleep.


I never did controlled crying because I can't bear it. I never needed to anyway because of the above-described system. It was great! I got sleep, they were kept quiet, didn't wake my hubby up nor anyone else!


Both boys just kind of stopped nightfeeding of their own according at around 6-7 months and were then put in the cot. When the youngest needed the cot the elder boy was moved into his new 'big boy bed'. No problems at all.


I am a great believer in comfort sucking - both during the day and during the night. It makes babies happy, and that's all I want for my kids. It also boosted my milk supply.


If you feel bored (during the day) when your baby is comfort sucking, you could knit, read, watch a DVD, chat with your friends etc etc. I trained my babies to do their comfort sucking at a time that was convenient to myself (i.e. when your favourite TV show is on and you'll be sitting down anyway).

I'm still b'feeding my 16-month old, but only at night. It's mainly comfort-sucking, I know, as he's doesn't really ask for it when somebody else tucks him in. The problem is that when he wakes up in the middle of the night, I'm usually the one who goes to his room (as hubby needs to work, whereas I can catch a nap in the middle of the day the next day) and he would inevitably ask for the breast and would only settle when he gets it. Like Snow Rose, I just lie down on my side next to him and let him latch on; switching sides when needed. This way, I get my sleep and he gets his sleep, with minimal fuss. We'd tried controlled crying, but just couldn't bear it. Also tried the pacifier before, but he would just spit it out.


(Snow Rose, interested to know how you finally weaned your kids. My son doesn't seem to 'lose interest'; in fact, now that he's more vocal, he asks for it!)

Ellie -


I think your baby is too young yet for Ferber and controlled crying (he's more around 6 months of age.) If you really want to get him off your breast and the above suggestions aren't really what you are looking for, then I suggest Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Method - although it takes a bit longer, your baby doesn't have to cry through it. Her basic premise is the "gentle removal" method - in which you allow your baby to suck, but then BEFORE he falls asleep you unhook your latch and let him actually fall asleep without the breast.

hkchoichoi-i have tried that method,but usually even before i left the room,she wakes up-disturbed.

how s your no2.she slept thru the night?


Snowrose-i let her sleep with me,but only for one concern,cos asian babies are much smaller,im afraid to crush her.however,she only sucks during when she's really sleepy,normally before her nightsleeps..and wants to log on during the wee hours of morning.but yep,thanks for being a firm believer in comfort sucking.i feel so guilty sometimes.

Both of my children weaned easily. I'll be honest and tell you the real reason. Unfortunately I had a low milk supply and by 13 months there really wasn't a lot (possibly because I was working f/t at a very busy job back then). Another factor was that my son became distractable - preferring to crawl around rather than feed.


Breastfeeding made my experience of motherhood so much more meaningful. Everyone always comments on how happy my kids are and I do believe breastfeeding contributed to that (especially comfort sucking, as mentioned before).


I never did worry about crushing my son while I was asleep. I think this is something people worry about but doesn't actually happen. Maybe you should ask your midwife/ lactation consultant / health visitor? I don't know much about this topic.


A really fab person to consult would be Mrs Yvonne Heavyside - she's a health visitor who can offer breastfeeding advice (actually advice on almost all mother & baby topics). She'll even check your feeding position if your nervous. Yvonne does home visits for about $600 but if you can't afford it you can go to her Mother & Baby session at the Matilda on Thursday for $60. At that group you could ask a quick question only, obviously if you want one hour's worth of advice it would have to be a home visit. Anyway, you can call Yvonne on 2530 1905 or the Matilda Hospital on 2849 0111.

Hi Ellie-


if she wakes up after you put her down, then try tapping her gently. Just tap her gently and say "shhhhh." try and get her used to being in her bed, with you nearby, but not necessarily holding her. I had to do that with my #1.


#2 sleeps easily through the night from 10.5 weeks. I think she was just made that way. Just an easier sleeper than my #1 was.

You sound very tired, however, more information is needed about your baby's age, weight and feeding to make an assessment.



Controlled crying is not recommended for infants under 6 months.



I suggest you see a midwife or lactation consultant who can assess and help with feeding management.



Well Baby Clinic 2849 1500

Matilda International Hospital

Hong Kong

http://www.matilda.org