How strict is your routine - Survey

Personally, I love routines. I like the fact that my 17 week old baby:

- drinks milk 5x daily at the same timings.

- goes to sleep by 7pm

- wakes up at 7-7.30am

- naps are short but at least 3x daily, 30-45 mins on his own at around the same timings.


But as much as I love it, I wonder how strict should I adhere to it? How much leeway do I have with the routine such that family life is not ruled by it? At the moment, it is - I usually don't go out after his 2.30pm feed as he is happier outside then. And of course, we don't go out at night anymore unless we have a babysitter. But I want to know if I can balance this better - that my son is remains contented and rested but yet flexible enough at times for his parents to do stuff not in line with his routine?


So, questions:

1) how old is your baby?

2) what is his/her routine like?

3) how strict are you with it? e.g. do you choose not to go out at certain times of the day because you would rather he/she nap properly at home?

4) if you do break the routine, when and how often?

5) what portions of his routine are you more comfortable with breaking at times, which parts will you not compromise?


Thanks in advance for sharing!

Hi Wheelymate


My son is 10 weeks old and up until this week, he never really followed a routine which meant he still wasn't sleeping over night. After 'talking' and being adviced from a few people from this forum, I bought Gina Fords book and tried to follow her rules.

I was a bit sceptical at first as it was really strict but amazingly after following her rules, my son started sleeping from about 8.30pm through to 7am with a feed in between at 11pm. Yippee and fingers crossed that this continues as last night was his second night sleeping through.

Because this is working for him, I have decided to be quite strict with him and if possible keep to the routine.

- first day milk at 7am

- naps in the mornings for about 45mins but varies from when he will start his nap. I am not so strict with this as I have to do a school run and then some shopping so don't usually get back home until about 10am. He would probably doze off in the pram and in the car but I'm not too worried with that.

- Milk every 4 hours or so and about 2-2.5 hours sleep in the afternoon. He will have a last feed at about 6.30pm after his bath.

- Doesn't really sleep until about 8pm but this varies depending on when he naps during the afternoon. I'm not so strict on his napping as long as he doesn't sleep past 5pm and not more than 2.5 hours.

Normally I prefer his feeds to be quite routine so he does get a last feed at 11pm (we wake him up)and by that time I'm ready to drop off as well.


We have started going out in the evenings after his 6.30pm feed to the local restaurant (our clubhouse as we don't have a helper). We go there as the staff know us quite well and will happily entertain our baby if he starts crying or needs attention. Usually he will be asleep when we go out and will happily sleep in his pram whilst we eat. I think it also helps if the restaurant is fairly quiet so he's not jumping with every loud noise.


At the moment I prefer not to go out during the afternoon as I like him to have a good sleep at home and also it's very hard work when the weather is very hot.

Hopefully his routine won't need to be as rigid when he gets a bit older as I would love to go out more when the weather becomes cooler.

How strict you are with the routine depends on many factors I think, such as which approach the parents feel more comfortable with, the effect on the baby (and parents!) of a break in the routine, practical considerations etc etc.


I breastfed my youngest on demand, so there was no routine there.


However, we are quite strict about bedtimes - I'm really bad at handling sleep deprivation! For the first few months of his life, we just let his nap times 'evolve' naturally, and then by about 5-6 months we stuck to them.


With my older boy (nearly 3), I don't mess with his naps because he gets very whingy and whiny if I do, especially if I wake him early instead of letting him wake up by himself. If necessary I have him skip his nap entirely rather than have to wake him up.


Getting out and about: kids can nap in the car and we also take rice boxes (prepared by my helper) if we're going to be out at meal times. However, we did go through a phase of not being able to go out in the car in the morning because the little one would fall asleep and then not want his nap.


Beware of following your routine too strictly because if anything does happen to 'force' you to temporarily abandon it, this can be very upsetting for your child.

Hi Wheelymate, I am also quite particular about my 5 month old taking her naps at home in her cot. If I take her out, I try to time it in between naps (going out after her morning nap and being home for her lunchtime nap). I dont; mind her taking her late afternoon nap outside though. She has only really been on this routine for the last 2 - 3weeks, so I am quite careful not to disrupt it at this stage. I am sure later on I will be more flexible.

mummybee,


thanks! personally, i am quite rigid and just too scared to try anything different - it's really my hubby who insists that while routines are important, we can't be so rigid because he thinks that's just as unhealthy!


"life becomes better as bub gets older" - certainly true!! :)

primrose: if only my baby could sleep for 2 hours in a pram!!


mummybee: i was searching for a topic the other day and came across an old thread by you about your baby's night wakings. i hope all is is order now and if so, i can totally understand why you would be afraid to try something outside your routine - nobody wants to go through multiple night wakings!!

Hi wheelymate my baby is 3 months and has no routine whats so ever I think this is beacuse I am lazy keep meaning to start one, but he is a very happy baby and has slept through the night since he was three weeks old,


Afternoon sleeps, I will put him down when I can see that he is getting tired, either in his pram, bed or in my bed whichever is closet,


Feeding I try to keep a mental note of when he is due for a btl but this does not always work, so I usually demand feed this does need to change as sometimes I dont know if he is getting to much or little,


Outings, I generally take him out when ever I want to go out and he is not phased by it at all,


I have been told several times that I am making a rock for my back, by been very casual but he really is very happy all the time so for now it seems to be working.

neska,


you are v lucky, a baby that sleeps through at 3 weeks!!


routines: whatever that makes you and baby happy, that's most important! only problem with napping on your bed is that if he gets too used to it, it might be dangerous to leave him alone and go about your other chores as he gets older. i know my bubs is happier on my bed but that was my concern so stopped that!