bath and sleep problems since illness

my 10.5mnth old used to go to sleep fine after her last milk feed and sleep thru the night since 2.5 months until her recent illness. she was hospitalised for wheezing and baby bronchialitis. the last night in the hospital she slept thru, but not when she got home. also she used to be put into her cot and she'd turn over, suck her thumb and fall asleep with little fuss, even during her hospital stay. now however, a week after, she refuses to have me leave the side of the cot. i can't even walk to the other end of the room and sit down in the armchair. even after she turns around and sucks her thumb, as soon as i sneak out, she screams like she's never screamed before. in the middle of the night she wakes up and plays, refusing again to go back to sleep for over an hour.


i'v been told by one friend to be strict and she'll fall back into the routine 3- 4 days later, and someone else said it's too early after the illness to try controlled crying.


the other problem we are having is that she used to love the bath but now is a screaming terror. we are using the baby bath inside the big tub. she arches back or stands up and cries hysterically. have taken her to the pool, and although she's not as enthusiastic as before the illness, she still is calm, splashes her arms and kicks a bit playing.


the other thing is she seems to cry at the slightest thing. i don't know what it is, balloons? lots of people? loud bday party? but she seems to easily cry. i just don't want people to think that we have a spoilt baby on our hands and that we are parents unable to control their child.


i feel very helpless and am at my wits end. pls, has anyone been through this and what can i do?

Wow -


you must be going CRAZY! I had a similar experience although my daughter was older but it sounds the same.


I highly recommend you take a look at Richard Ferber's "Solve your Child's Sleep Problems" as your daughter is old enough. Controlled crying (the term) is often misapplied, and reading his book will allow you to do it properly, with little stress to yourself and your child. It sounds like she's gotten used to having your extra attention at night (as you were worried) and she needs to wean herself off of that. If she's all better after her illness, I don't think it would be too hard to start her on the controlled crying. (but PLEASE read the book as you'll understand the concept of baby sleep in general and get good at troubleshooting in the long run.)


It's hard when babies develop sleep problems when they didn't have any before, and I can totally understand your frustration.


I'm thinking that since your child is probably not sleeping well and recovering from her illness, she's just a bit sensitive for the moment. After her sleep issues are solved, I bet that other issues will be less of an issue. It also may be a combination of your being stressed already rubbing off on her. Don't worry about what other people think of your baby - she's yours and yours alone and you know her best. Everyone parents differently and your baby may just be a bit more sensitive than other people's babies.


Solve sleep first - because once you do that, you will feel better (because you are getting more rest) therefore giving you more patience to deal with the other things.


Lots of luck! you have my full support as I went through a month of crazy multiple wakeups from February to March. Then someone recommended Ferber, and BAM - no more sleep problems. (two days DRAMATIC improvement, six days completely solved.)

will try to find the book, but could you walk me breifly thru what i can do? thanks!

hkchoichoi has offerd you great advice and as she says work on the sleep first and the other should fall into place. But in the mean time with the bathing have you tried showering her with you or your hubby. Our daughter loves having a shower, my hubby gets in and gets the water temp right then i pass bubs to him. I stay near by and my hubby calls me when his finished and hands her to me before he steps out of the shower. Just thought you could give it a go.

we thought of that as well but hubby doesn't get back until late from work most nights, wll after the bath. though i have a helper, i'm not to comfortable her seeing me in my bday suit. suppose i could wear a swimsuit but...


anyways i think we will give it a go anwyays.


thanks!

Ha well yes i can understand you not wanting to do the shower routine with your helper! You could try it by your self i have it's just easier with some on to help you. Just lie you babys towel on the floor in the bathroom and after you have got her all prepared lie her on the towel while you get the water temp right. When finished showering just put bubs straight onto the towel before truning off the water or getting your own towel. Or as you said you could shower in your cosie.

yes mummybee - i really hope she gets on track by herself because it's so heartbreaking to hear her cry as she is doing when i leave her. i don't mind waiting another week (it's been a week since she was discharged now. how did you manage to get your baby back into her routine?


Perthites - today tried bathing with her, hubby came home early to help. she didn't cry in the bath, BUT she still wouldn't sit really, always moving around, turning around to check i was there, from time to time turn around and cling to me etc etc. when we took her out, the crying began. guess we'll have to try again tomorrow and the next night to try to fine tune it, and slowly get her used to it?? no point even getting a bathseat as she's just not wanting to sit!

Oh I ment an actual shower, it is so different from a bath as the running water is relaxing well for our daughter anyway. She just holds her head back and goes all limp like she at some spa retreat! Also your holding bubs so it's a nice bonding thing. Also it's not uncommon for that age baby to be experiencing seperation anxitey